Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Whoring for Allah

Planet Iran claims to have obtained a document advertising "temporary marriages" for pilgrims en route to the shrine of Imam Reza.
Temporary Marriage (Marriage is among the traditions of the Prophet Mohammad)

In order to elevate the spiritual atmosphere, create proper psychological conditions and tranquility of mind, the Province of the Quds’eh-Razavi of Khorassan has created centers for temporary marriage (just next door to the shrine) for those brothers who are on pilgrimage to the shrine of our eighth Imam, Imam Reza, and who are far away from their spouses.

To that end, we call on all our sisters who are virgins, who are between the ages of 12 and 35 to cooperate with us. Each of our sisters who signs up will be bound by a two year contract with the province of the Quds’eh-Razavi of Khorassan and will be required to spend at least 25 days of each month temporarily married to those brothers who are on pilgrimage. The period of the contract will be considered as a part of the employment experience of the applicant. The period of each temporary marriage can be anywhere between 5 hours to 10 days. The prices are as follows:
  • 5 hour temporary marriage – 50,000 Tomans ($50 US)
  • One day temporary marriage – 75,000 Tomans ($75 US)
  • Two day temporary marriage – 100,000 Tomans ($100 US)
  • Three day temporary marriage – 150,000 Tomans ($150 US)
  • Between 4 and 10 day temporary marriage – 300,000 Tomans ($300 US)
Our sisters who are virgins will receive a bonus of 100,000 Tomans ($100 US) for the removal of their hymen.

After the expiration of the two year contract, should our sisters still be under 35 years of age and should they be so inclined, they can be added to the waiting list of those who are seeking long-term temporary marriage. The employed sisters are obligated to donate 5% of their earnings to the Shrine of Imam Reza. We ask that all the sisters who are interested in applying, to furnish two full-length photographs (fully hijabed and properly veiled), their academic diplomas, proof of their virginity and a certificate of good physical and psychological health which they can obtain through the health and human services of the township of their residence. Please forward all compiled material and send to the below address by the 31st of the month of Ordibehesht, 1389 (May 21st, 2010).

Attention: For sisters who are below 14 years of age, a written consent from their fathers or male guardian is required.
If the Olympics ever has an event called "Lying with a straight face", the above would be a slam dunk for the gold. On a brighter note Americans could earn a thing or two from Imam Reza about how to treat women: I hear the Nevada brothels demand up to 50% as the house cut.

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